It's 7:18 on Tuesday, and I just finished a three-mile easy run. In a few hours we will be heading off to Moscow enroute to meeting our daughter, Olesya. I think the pictures did me in this time. When we adopted Nate, there was no picture, just a medical and a name. Because there was no picture, this phantasmal name was just that, a name. It was impossible for me to make any connection to this child other than blind hope. You might think this a bad thing, but in one anxiety-laden way, it's not. When you adopt from abroad, the medicals are scary, and you must go into the adoption with some cautiousness. The child could be really sick and end up not being adopted because they are too unwell. Also, there is always the possibility until that court date that a family member will come forward and adopt the child. So, when we went to meet Nate, I walked into that room prepared to be objective about our decision to adopt him. Of course, the second he walked into the room, it was over and he was my son. With Olesya, that moment has already happened. When I saw those pictures, it was over. So, I leave today to make my way to her, and I have an underlying anxiety about her health and her care and her happiness. I can't get over how nervous I am about this trip, and I shouldn't be. This is my third time in Moscow, my second adoption, and yet, I'm more worried about this adoption than I was with Nate.
Well, next time I write, I will have met Olesya and everything will have turned out fine. If I somehow get access to a computer in Russia with an English font, I might try to post again. Off to Mother Russia!
1 comment:
We saw the pictures of Olesya and you guys look so happy! She is beautiful, and we know that even thought it won't be long until you are back there to get here, it will be too long in your heart. We pray for all of you daily and can't wait to meet that angel! We'll be down Superbowl weekend and can't wait to hear about your trip!
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